We’ve reviewed a lot of music this year. Some music was great. Other music makes us think of nails on chalkboard. This celebrates the latter as we reveal the lowest scoring tracks we’ve talked about this year.
Here on Freezenet, we’ve, to date, reviews 116 tracks. Some were pretty good. Others… well, not so much. Sometimes, we regret giving certain tracks a listen. Sometimes, we question production decisions. At any rate, here were the tracks we thought were the worst out of all of the music reviewed in 2014. So, prepare your ear drums. This is the top 10 worst tracks we’ve heard in 2014.
10. OneRepublic – Counting Stars
[RIAA]
While this track initially seemed to strive to showcase some talent, it ended up being an incredibly boring track with vocalists hitting rather high notes seemingly for no real good reason. For offering absolutely nothing memorable, this track squeaks in at number 10.
3/10
9. Justin Timberlake – Not a Bad Thing
[RIAA]
This attempt at a romantic track turns into a highly boring track with lyrics I’ve heard a million times over. As if crammed with cliche’s wasn’t enough, the percussion’s were seemingly left on auto-pilot. This track ultimately wasn’t enough for me to leave a phone number and makes it in this list at number 9.
3/10
8. Kate Perry – Dark Horse
[RIAA]
While the chorus was at least bearable, the versus ended up being nothing but weird bass drum. What really made this track earn the number 8 slot was the addition of a delay effect that not only fell flat, but ended up being an audible mess. Definitely deserves to be on the avoid list.
3/10
7. The Bloodhound Gang – The Bad Touch
[RIAA]
Proving that not all bad music came from the present, this 1999 release terrorized the eardrums of listeners everywhere as jocks wouldn’t stop playing it in the early 2000’s. The track featured annoying lyrics that ultimately was more wall to wall advertising than clever. Useless outside of X-Rated parody videos.
3/10
6. Ylvis – The Fox (What Does The Fox Say)
[RIAA]
RIAA pop music continues to dominate our top ten list with this entry. This track features vocals that sound like someone was singing horribly in the shower. While supposedly a parody of “techno music” according to some, the resemblance is, at best, ambiguous. What you ended up with here is a track that serves to annoy more than entertain.
3/10
5. Demi Lovato – Neon Lights
[RIAA]
The scores continue to drop as we reach number 5 on our list. With highly repetitive lyrics and randomly inserted musical elements with no logical rhyme or reason, this track pushes the envelope for how bad a track can be. What really sealed the fate for this track was the fact that it randomly ends in the middle of one of the lyrics as if the producer simply walked off the job part way through the process.
2.5/10
4. MAGIC! – Rude
[RIAA]
Whining its way into number 4 is this track that I seriously regret hearing. This track is anything but magical. With vocals that were painful to listen to, this track made me seriously question why I was even listening to it in the first place. If that weren’t bad enough, you were in for musical backing that was weak and lacks any real emotional connection.
2.5/10
3. Skrillex Feat. Sirah – Bangarang
[RIAA]
Being the sole entry that isn’t pop music, this track manages to wub wub wub it’s way into number 3 on our list. While one can small brief instances of what could be music somewhere in the mess of sound, nothing ever actually connects and it ends up being more sound than music. While it may be difficult to produce a lot of these sounds, it doesn’t make this track a good listening experience. A definite worthy entry into the worst music list for me.
2/10
Iggy Azalea – Fancy ft. Charli XCX
[RIAA]
Could music get worse than Skrillex? Frighteningly, yes. This track randomly places in samples and features lyrics that is more of a commentary of what’s wrong with society more than something to find any emotional connection to. The production value was so low, you needed a shovel to dig for it. Besides why was money spent to produce this, the most obvious question is, will RIAA music sweep the list?
2/10
1. Robin Thicke – Blurred Lines ft. T.I., Pharrell
[RIAA]
What can we say? Looks like the RIAA has swept the list for pushing the worst music we’ve ever heard. This track was more of a checklist of things producers seem to think will make a track sell without actually producing something worth listening to. With a dash of objectification of women for that added layer of controversy, this track also features elements from other high selling genre’s. What ended up happening was a musical mess more than anything else. This nails on chalkboard track was truly deserving of being on the top of the list as it became the only track we’ve reviewed that earned a score of less than 2. While we’ve heard a lot of bad music, there can only be one track that takes the title – and this was by far and away the most deserving track of the year. I seriously never want to hear this track ever again.
1/10
Honorable Mentions
We couldn’t leave the list there. We had to throw in a few other tracks that were also extremely painful to listen to. So here’s some honorable mentions in bad music:
Capital Cities – Safe and Sound (RIAA) Another pop track. While there may have been some positive elements in this track, the negative seriously outweighed the positives one could hear in this track. With the middle portion of this track that was seriously jarring, this track was little more than lost potential.
3.5/10
Royal Blood – Out of the Black (RIAA)
This track proves that rock music can sound really really bad. While this is the only rock track on this list, it doesn’t necessarily hold back on low quality. With dry sound resulting from being a two piece band, the lyrics end up being really repetitive to the point where you wonder if the writer ran out of ideas here.
3.5/10
Sam Smith – Stay With Me (RIAA)
The RIAA manages to sweep the honorable mentions section as well with this last pop entry. The mumbling vocals really drew our attention to how bad this track was. The random hitting of high notes was what won us over with giving this track the last slot in the honorable mentions list.
3.5/10
We hope you enjoyed this list! Join us tomorrow as we deliver the top 10 worst video games list!
Drew Wilson on Twitter: @icecube85
